Thursday, March 15, 2018

Life in the Weeds

I am going to start this first post by saying, "I am in the Weeds." I am a forty something wife, mother of three, daughter of an Alzheimer's patient, former elementary school teacher and farm girl. Needless to say I have a lot on my plate. Sometimes I tend to get overwhelmed by the chaos. My husband is usually the voice of reason in the madness. This irritates me because I really don't like it when he is right and I am not. His words of wisdom go something like this, "You better cherish this while you have it. This isn't going to last forever."

This has been a hard week. My mother has been living with us since October after she experienced a sharp cognitive decline. That was a huge adjustment for everyone. However, this week we have been working on cleaning out her house. My son and daughter-in-law are going to be living there soon. I have had a hard time myself. It is hard to explain parting with things that are associated with my parents, my childhood and all of the memories that are associated with this change. It has been hard for me to come to the realization that Mom is never going back. She is never going to live there again and I can never go home to my parents' house again.

I just live down the road from my parents' house. My mother, even with dementia knows that her stuff is in that house. She doesn't remember living there but she recognizes the stuff. This is making it difficult for everyone. She has tried to sneak off three times. She was successful only once but it was enough to scare the crap out of us. She doesn't understand why it is such a big deal. She tells us that she has two feet and good legs and she can out walk anyone on this hill.

Today, I decided we need a break from this craziness. I took her out to lunch and on the way home we stopped just down the road from my house to pick a bouquet of March flowers. We get out of the car and I tell her to be careful, stay on the flat and watch for snakes. The next thing I know my 72 year old mother is climbing on a dozer pile to pick flowers, and promptly gets tangled it the weeds and goes rolling down the hill. There I was "In the Weeds" with my mom. Two bouquets of flowers a mother and a daughter laughing and loving.

The moral of this little story is being "In the Weeds" with the people you love is not so bad after all. Cherish it while you have it because it may not last forever.

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