Thursday, April 23, 2020

The Story in the Storm

The Story in the Storm

I recently read an article about how we are handling the social isolation and the corona virus. The quick and dirty of it is that it said we are all in the same storm but not necessarily in the same boat. That really hit home for me, while my family may not be sailing through this storm in a yacht, our little boat holds us and keeps us safe. Some days it feels like our boat is a canoe with a leak and I am using a flip-flop to paddle and a thimble to bail water but at the end of the day we are still afloat. 

There are a lot of emotions in the story, my son and his wife are so excited that the child they have prayed for and waited for will be here in August. The reality is that they are not able to celebrate with friends and family, they may not be able to have baby showers and be loved on by their family and friends, she has to attend doctor appointments and ultrasounds alone, if things don't improve they may be alone when she makes her appearance in this world. It saddens me as a first time grandparent that I may have to wait to hold this sweet baby girl.

My oldest daughter was smack dab in the middle of her student teaching. She is going to be a fabulous and amazing high school Ag teacher but for now she has unfinished business. Teachers don't just teach students, they love them. You see she wasn't done loving them yet. She worries about them as people not just students. She worries if they are safe, if they are fed, if they are loved  and if they are emotionally okay. She has no control over the things that are happening around her, distance learning, school being  cancelled for the rest of the year,  MSU cancelling her graduation, and the unthinkable, one of precious students committing suicide.

My youngest, this is supposed to be an amazing time in her life. She got her drivers license this last year. She loves school and everything that comes with it. She is missing out on so much. She was named  FFA Regional President, she was supposed to be installed into office in March but that was cancelled, now FFA camp and State Convention are cancelled. She has lost her job due to this mess. She is missing out on all the fun stuff that your junior year and the summer before your senior year lets you experience. Making memories  with friends, prom and just experiencing that freedom that being a teenager brings. She has worked really hard for these accomplishments and it is painful to see her hurting.

My husband is my hero during all of this mess. While we are stuck at home whining about all the things that we are missing. He goes to work each day. He goes to the grocery and makes sure we have everything we need so we do not have to risk being out in public and bringing the virus home to my 74 year old mother that lives with us. He worries about us all and wants to  keep us safe while doing the things that have to be done.

Now for me as a public school teacher, I miss my kids. I worry about them daily. It breaks my heart that it ended this way. I wasn't done loving them yet. Our time was cut short and it just feels wrong.

I wrote this because I want everyone to see that in this storm we all have a different story. It doesn't matter your age, your job, or the size of your boat. Life is most definitely messy but there is still beauty.

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